She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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