No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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