i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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