discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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