Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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