I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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