she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Randomize
