he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
