I'm passing your future prison.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
