this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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