it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Randomize
