I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
