There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
