RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
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