Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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