I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize