i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
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