thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
