just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Randomize
