Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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