There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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