Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize