Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We don't watch enough power rangers
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize