What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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