If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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