girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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