it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
