Whod you bang
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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