BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize