a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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