i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
