Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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