I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
