Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
