Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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