Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
