we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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