were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
