I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
