We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
