Soap is not a condiment
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
