i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
