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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
