fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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