Me too!
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
