Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
