Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
