We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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