I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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