i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
