One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
